The empty moments.

At the start of the year my mum bought a Michael Leunig calendar. It was typically Leunig, a little bit funny, a little bit political, but last month the picture and associated poem really stood out to me. I'm not able to scan the picture just now, so the poem will suffice;

Come sit down beside me
I said to myself
And although it doesn't make sense,
I held my own hand
As a small sign of trust
And together I sat on the fence.
M. Leunig, "Sitting on the fence."

This poem centered upon some thoughts I've been having alot lately; so many people seem to struggle with being alone. Not just being alone, but even just sitting quietly. Next time you are with a friend try just sitting there quietly for a couple of minutes. Honestly, before a minute is even up I'll put money on the fact that the other person will try and say something. I'm not talking about awkward silences. They're completely different. They're the sort of thing that happens when you're talking to your best mate about his girlfriend, and then suddenly realise they've broken up.
Our culture is afraid of silence.

As a man who doesn't mind poetry, but is not the biggest fan, I'm going to break away from tradition and include a second poem in this post. Yes, two for the price of one. This one is slightly longer and was written by a Native American. It may have lost a little in translation, but I still love it for the sincerity that it holds. Another element that I find intriguing to take into account is the completely different culture that this man comes from, and the differences in values. Here it is;

It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart’s longing.

It doesn’t interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love for your dream for the adventure of being alive.

It doesn’t interest me what planets are squaring your moon... I want to know if you have touched the centre of your own sorrow if you have been opened by life’s betrayals or have become shrivelled and closed from fear of further pain.

I want to know if you can sit with pain mine or your own without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it.

I want to know if you can be with joy mine or your own if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful be realistic remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn’t interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself. If you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul. If you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see Beauty even when it is not pretty every day. And if you can source your own life from its presence. I want to know if you can live with failure yours and mine and still stand at the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of the full moon, “Yes.”

It doesn’t interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up after the night of grief and despair weary and bruised to the bone and do what needs to be done to feed the children.

It doesn’t interest me who you know or how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the centre of the fire with me and not shrink back.

It doesn’t interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you from the inside when all else falls away. I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.

Oriah Mountain Dreamer, "The Invitation"

The line that I find particularly interesting is the last. "I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments." So many people these days seem to disklike their own company. They surround themselves constantly with distractions, and when it comes to a quiet time they feel lost and out of control. I'm no psychologist, but this can't be healthy.

The other day I got home from work and sat down on the couch. My original intent was to turn on the TV, but along the way I lost all motivation. I ended up sitting there for close to an hour, just staring at the wall. Probably not everybodies idea of a fun afternoon, but I loved it. I had time to sit and think, to be still.

I think I do enjoy the company I keep in the empty moments.